Friday, October 31, 2014

quote | change

Change of one sort or another is the essence of life, so there will always be the loneliness and insecurity that come with change. When we refuse to accept that loneliness and insecurity are part of life, when we refuse to accept that they are the price of change, we close the door on many possibilities for ourselves; our lives become lessened…. Life evolves; change is constant.

Jean Vanier

Thursday, October 30, 2014

quote | ambition

When I was young, I longed to be a saint. What was I longing for? I think it was for certainty that my life had been, in the most profound sense, a ‘success’—that great and glorious success that is sanctity. We revere the saints, we imitate them, theirs is the true and lasting glory. Very clearly, this desire is, unconsciously, as worldly as that of the writer who wants to write a masterpiece or the politician who yearns to be prime minister or president. None of these ambitions has the least to do with what Jesus preached—that lowliness, that love for last place, that readiness to die and be forgotten…. To be concerned with oneself in any way, to watch one’s growth in ‘holiness’ or ‘prayer’, to be spiritually ambitious, all this Jesus earnestly sets his face against.

Sr. Wendy Beckett

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

quote | if we really want to...

"Life is meant to be lived from a Center, a divine Center. Each one of us can live such a life of amazing power and peace and serenity, of integration and confidence and simplified multiplicity, on one condition—that is, if we really want to. There is a divine Abyss within us all, a holy Infinite Center, a Heart, a Life who speaks in us and through us to the world."

Thomas Kelly

Sunday, October 12, 2014

one year, today

one year ago, we made vows, exchanged rings, and told each other:
i, liz, take you, samuel, to be my husband. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life.
then we got to celebrate with our family and friends!

but only three months prior, we got engaged at our favorite park! omg, we look REALLY young, don't we?
i had no idea what kind of journey we would embark on that day. NO idea. but i was content knowing the journey would be with you.

in our lifetime, we get to make millions of decisions that'll effect the course of our lives. the decision to let you borrow my copy of love does...the decision to go to paxti's and rei that one day...the decision to say, "maybe" (and not "no") when you asked to see me again and i was feeling super hesitant...the decision to admit to myself how my affections for you were growing...the decision to say "yes" to another date, and another, and another...the decision to be myself with you always...the decision to say that i loved you. all of those little decisions culminated in a fabulous day of celebration and commitment. i don't regret a single one of those decisions. people have said that you can choose a deeper and more profound love, if you want to. they have said you can be more in love with your life partner than when you first got married. they were right.365 days later from our "i do's," i feel more connection and love towards you than i could've imagined. all of our tiny little decisions to hold each other, share our dreams and ideas, bring up conflict and resolve it, engage, share a whole lotta meals, live out our values, experience life together...all of those have caused me to be more in love with you today than i thought i did on our wedding day. i so enjoy your company samuel! i love and appreciate how you challenge what i think, how you love me unconditionally, how you cause me to grow and learn, and how you've helped instill deeper compassion and humility, how you help me to be me, and how you infuse my life with deep joy. being married to you is a gift! thank you for being committed to know me deeply, and to love me the same.yours forever.
xoxo 

Sunday, September 28, 2014

month 11.5: the sweetest thing

god i love you. 
my affections run deep and the laughter, even deeper. 

it's been a pretty busy month (and a half), and i'm finally taking a deep breath to soak you in. 

we jumped from missoula, to france, to ennis, to the tetons, back to missoula, and then a week of hosting my sister, two girls, and momma. PHEW! 

we went to jb & nino's wedding (OMG, THE BEST FRENCH WEDDING EVER); we spent time with paula and i got to meet your entire french family; we roamed around paris and ate our hearts out; came back to ennis and prepared for our teton crest backpacking trip with mary, then backpacked for five days in an icy-cold paradise that ended in a true white sandy beach paradise; popped back to missoula to do three days of intense apartment hunting and secure a beautiful new abode; you turned 30!!!; then immediately afterward, hosted my sister, mom, and two nieces for a week.



i witnessed your incredible patience, your deep affections for a little someone (ly-di-a!!!), your love for all things jane austen, your physical abilities to (rather easily) climb passes and jump into glacial lakes, your insightful reflections on our experiences and interactions between us and with others, and your ability to keep in touch with people (i didn't realize you were so good at that), and oooooh yeah....your love of the radish kimchi my mom made (it was absolutely delightful to see you eat your heart out with spicy fermented kimchi love). 

and at the end of all of this activity, i felt joyful and fulfilled to be simply right next to you, watching mansfield park (which was far worse than the uk version mini-series of pride & prejudice). haha.

you are my happy place. you are my safe space. you are my deep sigh of relief. 

you are the sweetest thing.
happy 11.5 months of marriage my love.
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